You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
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