tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
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