Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Randomize
