I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
