Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Randomize
