I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
Randomize
