My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
