Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
