dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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