on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Randomize
