Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
My dick has a subreddit
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
