if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
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