Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
