he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
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