Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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