so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
I want you more than these girls want KFC
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
Randomize
