I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Randomize
