The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Randomize
