I love black thongs
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
