Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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