Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
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