Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
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