Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
That was before I lit my hair on fire
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