I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Randomize
