I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
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