i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
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