i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
