I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
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