yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
Ladies don't puke and tell
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Randomize
