it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
only if we run a train.
done.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
Randomize
