just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize
