So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
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