Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
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