hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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