Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Randomize
