Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Randomize
