...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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