We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize