i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
