This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
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