God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
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