Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize
