I love black thongs
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
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