R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
Randomize
