that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Randomize
