he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
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