Christians are straight up FREAKS
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Randomize