Don't make out with my wife yet
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
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