Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Randomize
