I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
