we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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