Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
We need to get me chipped asap
Randomize
