I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
apparently the secret to your success is patron
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
Randomize